Musings and thinkings

It was Sweep's last night in Cornwall. He'd had ever such a grand adventure. They'd all spent the day relaxing, and throwing a ball around, and wandering into Bude for Pasties and Coffee, and generally doing what the cubs called "Chilling", although Sweep was puzzled by that as the day had been extremely hot and sunny.

Auntie Angela was asking everyone if they'd had a good time, and it got Sweep thinking about all the great stuff he'd seen and done during his time in this land of wondrous delights. He thought about some of the things he'd learned, and some of the thoughts he'd thunk, and decided to make a list.

This is what Sweep came up with.

1. Cornwall is a long way from home but it's worth the trip.

2. Nothing is beautiful.

3. Lots and lots of nothing is very beautiful.

4. The Big Blue Wet Thing is big, blue, wet, and pretty.

5. Pasties are fantastic

6. You can see 'omes in biomes but you can't buy the 'omes in the biomes

7. Ben-Cubs can fly

8. Jon-Cubs can occasionally be meditative

9. Giant pasties are very fantastic

10. There are tractors in Cornwall

11. Lots of them.

12. And wasps.

13. Lots of them.

14. Uncle Bill makes good wasp-traps.

15. The sun is hot in Cornwall (Sweep decided this was because they must nearly be at the equator)

16. Jaffa Cakes come from the rainforest

17. Cheltenham is in Iceland.

18. Or is it Iceland that's in Cheltenham?

19. There are strangely named villages in Cornwall.

20. Sweep's favourite (and Auntie Angela's) is Polyphant.

21. Though he didn't see even one pachyderm there, never mind lots.

22. People in Cornwall make good lattes, especially if they have superb hats

23. You should be very careful about the kinds of pop you drink

24. Polperro is very pretty

25. But it has dangerous pop.

Sweep was getting very tired by this time, and decided he would have more thunks if he got himself to bed and had an early night, ready for the long drive tomorrow. He'd had a fabulous time on his adventure, and enjoyed himself so much. Uncle Bill and Auntie Angela really were the most amazing, clever, wonderful and humble people he'd ever encountered - in his totally unbiased and objective opinion.

Adventures in Eden - part 2

Sweep had finished his coffee, and very nice it was too. It had been made by a gentleman in the very best hat that Sweep had ever seen - he so wanted one himself but Uncle Bill said he'd need to spend a long time growing his hair to be able to look as good as the barista.

After coffee, because the Ben-Cub had gone off to find a zip or something (maybe he'd had a trouser-related incident, Sweep wasn't sure), Auntie Angela, Uncle Bill and the Jon-Cub went for a walk in the outside part. Sweep was a little bit perturbed when he spotted a strange creature ahead.

Uncle Bill said it was to remind people about recycling  rather than throwing stuff away. Sweep decided he'd recycle everything he could if it would stop that thing coming after him.

They climbed up a hill and stood underneath some wires. Sweep wasn't sure why, but Uncle Bill stood there for ages just looking along the wires to where they were fixed to the opposite hillside, as if he was waiting for something to happen. The other end was about half a mile away, so Sweep couldn't really see what it was all about, but after a while Uncle Bill said "he's coming". Sweep didn't know who was coming, but he looked up to see whether he could work it out. Just then, the Ben-Cub whizzed past, hanging from the wire!

Uncle Bill explained that it was  zip-wire (ah! so not trouser-trouble then!) and the Ben-Cub had gone for a fly along it. It was very long, and he'd been going very fast. Sweep decided that he preferred to have his feet firmly on the ground. Well he would, if he had any.

After the Ben-Cub came back, they all had a walk back to the big greenhouses, past a little pond. Sweep saw something coming out of the pond that worried him a bit.

"Paul Cannell!" thought Sweep. "It's the creepy crawly from last night's post!" - which was a strange thing to think, because he hadn't written last night's post at this stage - but we're indulging in artistic licence here so stop being so pernickety, OK? (And yes, Sweep does have 9 points on his artistic licence already and needs to be careful).

A bit further on Sweep happened across another one of the 'omes to buy - it looked to Sweep as if the Injuns might have been around here...

He decided that perhaps it would be safer in one of the greenhouses, so he asked Auntie Angela if it was time to go inside, and she said yes, they could do that. So they went into the mediterranean greenhouse (Uncle Bill was still talking about "buy 'omes", he seemed obsessed!)

Sweep saw lots of interesting things in this greenhouse. The first thing was a big stick.

Auntie Angela said it was something to do with Olive Oyl - but Sweep couldn't see her anywhere. There was no sign of Popeye either. Sweep decided just to stay confused, as normal.

He found an interesting tree - he decided it must be a cowboys & indians Christmas tree.

And then he found another one of the 'omes to buy.

"This one's called a wigwam" said Uncle Bill. 

"Oh dear!" thought Sweep - "more Injuns!" - and they moved on.

Sweep found some sunflowers, which he really liked.

But then Uncle Bill told him about a scary van called Goff that came around chopping people's ears off (that's what Sweep sort of heard anyway - like most people, he doesn't tend to listen much to what Uncle Bill is saying) - so Sweep decided they should move on again before the van drove by.

He saw some pigs that had been waiting for a feed for so long, they'd gone all fossilised as well, just like that horse was. 

"They don't seem to care about their animals much here", thought Sweep, "it's all plants, plants plants!"

Then Sweep saw a very strange thing - a bull and a load of people having a rave!

Sweep thought that was very odd. Even more odd when Uncle Bill told him that the bull's name was Denis.

Then Sweep turned round and saw something even more worrying...

"Eek!", said Sweep, and went off to change his underwear.

When he came back, he spotted another one of the 'omes to buy.

He was getting very puzzled by these now, because none of them had estate agent's signs outside, so how would anybody know they could buy them? He decided to ask Uncle Bill about it. Uncle Bill laughed and explained that Sweep had got it all wrong - they weren't for sale at all. The big greenhouses were called Biomes, and these were just part of the display. "Oh!", thought Sweep - "it even makes sense when you know that!" Which was surprising, because so little of what Uncle Bill says ever makes sense.

On the way out of the Biome (see, Sweep knows what it's called now) they passed something very exciting - an advert for Uncle Bill's favourite beer.

"OO beer is great", said Uncle Bill, "because it keeps the wasps and other insects from bothering you so much". Sweep thought it was fantastic that a beer could do that.

As they walked back through the outside part, Sweep saw several interesting things.

He saw the Jon-Cub in a rare moment of meditative silence...

He saw some lovely flags, which he decided they needed to have for Church - they'd look great in the churchyard.

He saw the Ben-Cub sailing a fossilised ship

And he saw a lovely couple of milk-producers...

No, not them, the two cows on the grass in the distance behind. Honestly, some people's minds!

Sweep decided to take a picture with just the cows in, since people had such thoughts.

Then Sweep saw something called the "Heavy Industrial Plant"

"Ah!" he thought - "I've seen signs about them crossing the road. I always wondered what they looked like."

He saw a strange woman having a lie down.

and he saw how mirrors are grown.

Then it was time to go.

He had one last look back across the wonderful place where he'd had such a fun adventure.

and then they headed for the car parks.

There was one last adventure waiting for Sweep - a bus ride back to the car!

It was a big bendy bus, and Sweep was very excited to be getting a ride on it. He sat down near the front, and they set off.

Pretty soon, they were back at the car, and everyone climbed in and set off back to the campsite. Sweep had had a busy day, and lots of fresh air. He was getting overtired - so Uncle Bill let him curl up in his special place on the dashboard as they drove home through all the lovely nothing.

Sweep dreamt of wonderful adventures in Biomeland.

He was in such a deep sleep that he had a little accident on the dashboard, but Auntie Angela had some tissues and cleaned it straight up, so we won't even mention that.

 

Adventures in Eden

Sweep had had a wonderful time at the Eden Project. There were so many things to see, and it was such a lovely hot, sunny day. He just couldn't imagine having had a better time. And now that he was feeling OK again after that bad pastie (and the special pop), he'd really enjoyed it.

Because it was lunchtime when they arrived, Auntie Angela said they should find a place to eat their picnic. There was a special place just for doing that, with tables and chairs and big umbrellas to shade you from the sun, so they sat there. Sweep loved picnics, and he tucked into this one with relish. Well, he would have if there'd been any relish, but there wasn't, so he had his sandwiches without relish, but he still really enjoyed them. They were ham and cheese, in special buns, with packets of bacon crisps, and cans of pop (not special pop, just the safe kind) and all sorts of goodies. "Yummy!", thought Sweep.

After the picnic, they tidied everything up and put all the rubbish in the different bins for different things, before going to explore the site. Sweep saw some amazing things as they went round.

He saw the biggest bee he'd ever seen!

He saw lots of different plants growing. Auntie Angela and the Cubs wondered what some of them were, but Sweep knew his onions...

He saw a kitchen right in the middle of a restaurant, and watched the chefs making all sorts of lovely things. But he didn't have any, because of the wonderful picnic Auntie Angela had made which he had so enjoyed, and had filled him up and given him such a feeling of well-being, and of being loved, that he could hardly describe it. (She's lovely, Auntie Angela is).

Then, they went into the big bubbly greenhouse that has the rainforest in it. Uncle Bill was talking about Buying Homes again - it was Buy 'Omes this and Buy 'Omes that, Sweep was curious about where these Homes were. But the first thing he saw when he went in wasn't a home, it was a ship! "That's a funny place to park a ship", thought Sweep. "I bet it was a bu.. I mean, really difficult to unload."

Auntie Angela explained that it wasn't a real ship anymore, it was just the front part that had been brought here to show how things people grew in far-away places were brought here for us to enjoy - things like bananas, and mangoes, and plastic toys from China. 

She showed him a special mark on the side of the ship...

She told Sweep it was called a Plimsoll Line. 

Sweep thought she must have made a mistake, because he couldn't see any gym shoes anywhere at all.

As they went further in, Sweep spotted something strange. "Look, Uncle Bill," he said - "I never knew that butterflies played football, but I think I've found the goalie!" Uncle Bill was very impressed with Sweep.

A little bit further on, Sweep saw something else that he was really pleased to see. The sign said something about emergency shelters for Vanuatu, but Sweep knew what this really was...

"Of course!", thought Sweep - "this must be one of the homes you can buy. That's why Uncle Bill was on about 'buy homes' this, and 'buy homes' that."

He saw another one a bit further on.

"This must be the deluxe model", he thought.

Then he came across a sort of campsite one.

"How did they manage to make an exact copy of our campsite?", wondered Sweep.

Sweep saw some other interesting things. He saw how they grow those little wriggly things that you see on the JML adverts in ASDA...

And he saw the special display of the Jaffa Cake, shown in its natural habitat...

He saw a sign which really worried him, because he was thirsty, and West Africa is a long way to go for a drink...

and he saw a big waterfall, right inside the greenhouse!

Then Sweep saw a special wall painting that he liked...

He liked it because it reminded him of the Starbucks logo, and he was gasping for a coffee. But Auntie Angela said there was such a lot more to see in here before it would be time to go for a coffee. Sweep was so pleased to hear that. Uncle Bill just made a funny noise.

Sweep saw something that he decided to call the "Squirty Plant"

And then another butterfly. He decided to call it "Beckham".

They clearly did like their football, these butterflies.

He spotted a strange pod thing on a plant.

Auntie Angela said that was cocoa, but Sweep wasn't fooled. He knew that cocoa comes in little brown boxes from the supermarket.

Then he saw the Jon-Cub investigating something.

"That must be Uncle Bill and Uncle Dave's new tooling-about vehicle!" thought Sweep.

And then, just as they were about to leave that greenhouse, Sweep spotted another interesting thing.

He'd wondered for ages what had become of Barney Rubble's little boy, and now he knew - he was running a dubious sort of place in the middle of a greenhouse. Weird.

And on the way out of the greenhouse, Sweep saw another thing, which he took to be a sign.

That's because it was a sign. But importantly, it was a sign about coffee. And Sweep REALLY wanted a coffee now. So he persuaded Auntie Angela that it was time for a sit down, and they went to the cafe and got...

COFFEE! Hurrah.

It was only three o'clock, and Sweep had done such a lot already, but there was still lots more to see and do. But Sweep knows that by now, you'll be worn out from reading, and in danger of becoming over-tired. So, Sweep will stop there for today, and tell you more about his Eden Adventures next time.

NIght-night, boys and girls! Sleep well - and try not to worry about big creepy-crawlies and flying things when you're in bed in the dark. I'm sure there are none where you are. 

Well, fairly sure. 

Well actually, I can't be sure at all. 

But I bet you're sure. 

Or maybe you're not. 

Perhaps you'd better put the light on and have a look under the bed. 

And don't forget the wardrobe. 

Or the chest of drawers. 

Actually, when he thinks about it, Sweep says perhaps you ought to go to the top of the stairs and scream for your mummy to come because their might be a big flying creepy-crawly thingy under your wardrobe or bed or chest of drawers, and you're worried and can't sleep. 

Yes, perhaps you'd better do that. 

Just to be on the safe side, I mean. After all, Health & Safety, eh?

Anyway, night-night. Sleep well, and we'll see you tomorrow.

If the big flying creepy-crawly monster thingy doesn't get you in the night, that is...

Buy homes??!

Sweep enjoyed the journey down to the Eden  Project. He amused himself by sticking his head out of the car window and letting his ears flap in the wind, and by reading the names of the villages they passed - some of them seemed funny to Sweep - Box's Shop, Altarnun, Polyphant, St Blazey - he'd never heard such things!

Soon, they arrived at the Eden Project and found a plum parking spot...

They walked down to the entrance, worrying all the time about how long the queues might be. Sweep spotted a horse that must have been waiting ever such a long time, because he'd all fossilised!

Sweep thought he saw Auntie Angela hiding behind the horse, but he wasn't sure. In any case, he was too busy feeling sorry for the poor animal. But then Uncle Bill told him it was going to have a starring role in a play about Wor Horse - "Well!" thought Sweep - " I didn't even know we HAD a horse!"

Sweep was feeling much refreshed after the fresh air on the journey, and excited about their adventure today. He was very pleased to see that there was no queue, and they all went straight in.

It was a wonderful place. Uncle Bill said something about how you could buy homes here, but Sweep couldn't see any estate agents, only big bubbly greenhouses - but he liked them, so that was ok. It was going to be a fun day!

Tune In later for more from Sweep!